Disco Inferno

The latest from Landover Baptist, one of the more with-it Christian churches in our modern world-
http://www.landoverbaptist.org/news1002/bookburning.html


Now, this would be funny if it weren't actually true. Not, perhaps, to the extent that these guys claim to do it, but I'm afraid this is the case. Not to be ragging on Christians (okay, maybe a little...) but that Bible verse is in reality used to justify the destruction of books of a 'pagan' or 'ungodly' nature. How do I know this? Because I once sat in a church and heard the priest use this exact verse to justify burning books, Tarot cards and things of a "heathen" (lacking a better term) origin in his backyard. I was shocked- burn books? What insanity was this? I was waiting for him to say, "Ha! Gotcha!" Unfortunately that moment never came- and I never returned to that church again, nor to any other. In a lot of ways, it was the nail in the coffin for me. Again, not that I have any particular beef with the church as a whole, as I doubt this book-burning goes really that extensively, but it was still a shock.
To me, destroying a book is a greater blasphemy than anything that book could contain. The written word is a way of preserving knowledge, or at least information and stories, from one generation to the next. I can crack a book and find the recorded wisdom of people gone by, people who crumbled to dust centuries before I ever drew breath. Is every written word necessarily true or accurate? Of course not, but why, when a book exists that has incorrect information, take a step backwards by not reading it? Do we discount Hippocrates and the humours in the body because medical science has rendered them obsolete? Well, while Hippocrates may not be exactly modern medicine, I think it's still useful to retain his writings as an example of scientific method, if nothing else. He based his conclusions on what he observed, and from this we can extrapolate why he drew the conclusions he did, and in so doing hopefully advance our own understanding a bit more. So again, because the church deems a book 'bad', it's to be consigned to oblivion? Well, the upside is, ideas have a funny way of continuing to pop up, despite the best efforts of those who would eradicate them. Free thought is one of our greatest gifts- don't throw it away for anyone, nor would a true thinker dare ask you to do so.
Well, thanks for reading my latest rant, stay well everyone!

The Best Revenge

Here's where we keep the armies
Here's where we write their names
Here's where our money got us
Here's our famous hall of shame
Here's where we starve the hungry
Here's where we cheat the poor
Here's where we beat the children
Here's where we pay the whores


Right here we stoned the prophets
Built idols out of mud
Right here we fed the lions
Christian flesh and Christian blood
-Alice Cooper, Brutal Planet

They say success is the best revenge, but you know what they say about a man who goes out for revenge- he better dig two graves, one for his enemy, the other for himself. Good thing I managed success without the revenge. The time is coming to close a door on one chapter of my life once and for all- when I get back to Connecticut, I plan on filing for divorce in the state of my residence, that is, Connecticut. As it turns out, my ex contested my last petition in the Oklahoma court on the grounds of no jurisdiction- that is, though I meet the legal requirements for an Oklahoma residency, for all legal purposes my residency remains in Connecticut. Actually, the Army agrees with this, as my address of record is still officially Connecticut. This was a minor setback, although also a learning experience. According to the courts, I have no more legal ability to file in Oklahoma than I do in, say Rhode Island. Neither state court has any legal jurisdiction, only Connecticut. I'm learning divorce is not as complicated as it may seem, although I trust the ex half as far as I can throw her.
Despite this, and as odd as it may seem, I bear her no ill will. I'm not interested in revenge, and I doubt she is either. It didn't work out for us, and I begin to see, never could. There was once a time when I would have taken her back, and would have gotten down on my knees to beg her to take me back. Now I see this was a mistake, and I see how now I need to cut ties with her once and for all. We're at least civil, and that's about as far as it's going to go. Through no fault of her own, she represents a time in my life when I was a slave to alcohol- not a proud chapter in my life. I'm not going through any 12-step program, I just decided hell with it, the cost is not worth the reward. My ex was a very demanding person, this I do fault her on. Yet I myself didn't know who I was. I guess it took a while, but the lesson finally sank in- that which can run should not crawl. Curiously enough, it goes back to a definition of compassion I once discussed with a friend. Compassion, you see, is not pity. Pity is for a lesser being, like a wounded animal. This creature we feel pity for is not our equal. Compassion is what we feel when we see that which can run crawling. Do we not want to reach down, haul this person to their feet, and say, what are you doing? Why debase yourself when you can stand beside me and my brothers and sisters as an equal? It's a recognition and exaltation of the human condition in all its best elements. Unfortunately, I chose to embrace the worst of my human condition. I crawled when I should have walked, and this motivated me to change. I became both proud and humble- proud of all that I've done, and all that I can do, yet humble enough to be a servant to others.
But enough dwelling on the past- the past is not the present, and the future is not yet written. So all this talk, what of action? That's easy- I plan to make this as easy or as difficult as need be. I plan to hire an attorney there who will represent me in absentia, as I'll more than likely be in Oklahoma. With no common property, the only issue is custody of the children. This is where it gets a bit sticky. I realize by publishing this on the Internet, it could come back to haunt me, as it'll never truly go away. Well, that's all right. I'm planning on trying for partial custody of the kids, mainly for the sake of convenience. I know full well what it says on paper and what happens in real life are often two different things, and accept this fact. Partial custody differs from visitation rights, too. This too is convenient. Actually, we have a great place here in Oklahoma for the kids to hang out, and plenty of new people to meet on post. No doubt they would fit right in with the crazy family we call the Army. As visitation is separate from custody, really it's just a matter of paperwork, yet paperwork is what makes the world go round. I'd like to put them on military insurance, again for the sake of convenience- why pay when you don't have to? My insurance is little to no cost to me, so I figured extending that to the kids would be a good plan. They are covered by the ex's insurance, which she pays for. See my logic here? If I can help her out, why not? No doubt she has a hundred reasons why not, but I trust reason will prevail. Apart from that, partial custody allows me to continue to live off post, as I'll still be pulling a housing allowance. Again, I'm trying to make this a win-win situation, though I doubt the ex will see it that way. Regardless, I'm looking out for my own interests too.
Then there's Tabatha, the force that got me this far. How else can I describe her? It was her who taught me to trust in myself, and as time went on I began to see what she meant, that I could accomplish not only what needed to be done to correct my life and get back on the path I needed to be on, but more too. So the result? I'm a success by any standard, and having a pretty good time doing it. So though I'll be back in Connecticut for a short while, home, after all, is where the heart is.

Black Sunday

It's Black Friday, the day when retail workers have to get up early to go to work, and retailers attempt to net a healthy profit. Capitalism in action, I guess. Personally, I spent my Friday morning sleeping late and not really caring one way or the other. I'm pretty sure the wheels of industry will turn without me today. But at any rate, enjoying the long weekend, especially since at the end of it, more or less, I go on leave. I'm beginning to think I get more done on days off than on the days I go into work.
Thanksgiving was good, spent it down here in Oklahoma, and apart from that I'm not sure what Christmas holds, I may end up pulling duty, apart from that I don't have any major plans yet apart from staying out of trouble. The word is that a lot of things are changing in my unit, which really is for the better, I think. There's even talk of an upcoming deployment, but then again, put rumors in one hand and BS in the other and see which one fills up first, as they say. But Monday is the last day I have to report in before catching a flight at some ungodly hour in the morning from Oklahoma City. Hopefully the old Ford will survive this trip as well, as I need to replace one of the front bushings before too long. Pretty soon that car will be more replacement parts than anything else, assuming it's not already. Well, it's got four wheels, it's paid for and it runs. At some point I'll have to replace it, as it goes the way of all cars, so I'm thinking of paying a visit to a person I met a while ago, who sells, among other vehicles, decomissioned police cruisers. Though they have no warranty, they no doubt have been well-maintained by their respective forces. And besides, they look like exactly what they are- decomissioned police cruisers. I'll look into local laws (as well as funding for such an inane project) as to what you can and can't put on your vehicles. Unfortunately, Halloween is quite a distance away, and I'm not sure how my soon-to-be bride would feel about going to the corner store in the Baron Samedi mobile. Or how my superiors in the good old US Army would feel about that. Well, it would be cool as hell in October, though.
In many ways, yes, I've never grown up. I still have the same juvenile daydreams I always did, but as time goes on, I know full well how that has to be tempered by common sense. True, there's a place for the weird, surreal ideas I have, but at the same time, unfortunately reality occasionally gets in the way. Well, such is the price we pay, having to work for a living, and other injustices. But in all seriousness, working hard is not one of the things I would change in my life. Without that, and the lessons it provides, where would we be?

When The Sun Don't Shine

Time is an amazing invention; it is a human concept and an illusion. There is no time, only the illusion of time passing. The sun rises and sets, creating day and night. We are born, age and die. Clocks measure seconds, minutes and hours. Calendars measure days, weeks, months and years. These are the many ways we see time pass. Our memories link us to the past events that have happened. We think we live in the present, and there is a future ahead of us.
-Angelo Nasias, Divination, Tarot and the Bible

Well, I'd be remiss if I didn't say a few words about an old friend, whose full name I recently learned. I just called him Billy, not knowing he was apparently Sir William Robert, although I also knew him as Billy Bob. This was Tabatha's dog, a red and white Australian shepherd, with a high degree of intelligence and an obsession with tennis balls. Being a shepherd, he was occasionally a hyperactive goof, but also a loyal friend to Tabatha, and, since we are family in everything but name, me too. He grew very sick and passed on, but we still remember him. He was the consumnate cool dog, very good and much loved, and very expressive. Of course, dogs don't talk, at least not in words. Billy could express a great deal, as some dogs do, and was the first member of Tabatha's family I met, curiously enough on our first date. He gave me the once-over, decided I was okay, and that was that. Tabatha says dogs are a good judge of people, perhaps she's right. Billy and I were thick as thieves after that, and his passing left a mark on me as well as our family. Tabatha has since adopted two other dogs, Eris, who is, according to her, (Tabatha, not Eris) 'my' dog, and Hercules, who is a big friendly mountain of dog, perhaps a little short on sense, but then again, he makes up for it in other areas. Eris is a good girl, reminiscent in some ways of Billy- smart, and devoted to her family. I hear there may be puppies on the way, a fact that Tabatha is less than thrilled ab0ut, but then again, hard not to love your kids. Ultimately, every witch needs a familiar, ha ha. I'm not a witch, but then again, where would we all be without the animals in our lives, both those we eat and those we don't? Much like dressing up for Halloween, it's something I'll never outgrow, no matter how old and responsible I get.

Tell Me All That You Know

Give me your secrets
Bring me a sign
Give me a reason
To walk the fire
See another dawn
Through your daughter's eyes
You give me a reason
To walk the fire
-Robert Duncan

The above is the theme song for a newer season of the TV show The Unit- dealing with the (fictional) Delta Force, the black-ops guys we all hear about but never see. True, there are black ops, primarily handled by the Special Forces- I've had the privelege of knowing a couple SF guys, and they're pretty hardcore. What they do, I don't ask, and they don't tell, ha ha. At any rate, it's a cool show. So it would seem I too have plenty of reasons to 'walk the fire'- now if I could only get out there and get a little piece of the action! Being stateside is all well and good, but I'm not going to lie, it's all about the promotion and money. Well, that and defending the country, all that noble stuff. I didn't sign on to be a mercenary, I signed on to be a soldier. It's not always easy to keep up one's idealism, but you do what you can. I'd like to think in some small way I've made a difference. It's always odd (and this still happens) when some stranger comes up to you and thanks you for your service to the country. I do appreciate it, to all you people who have said that to me, and really, every single time it makes me proud that I wear 'U. S. Army' over my heart. But you civilians pay my salary, and keep me up and running, so on behalf of the Army, thank you guys, we need you just as much as you need us.
In other world news, still counting the days until I get back to Connecticut, however short a time it may be. There's always the next day, the next stepping stone. And in time, I know it'll all come together. One of the things I've realized, perhaps never believed till now, is that I run this show. What happens, or does not happen, depends on me. Not on the fall of the cards, or the position of the stars, but on my own actions. Actions bring results, for better or worse, and thoughts become actions. Much like Plato, I put mind uber alles- that is, mind and will are the factors that first determine what actions will be- then actions determine consequences, for good or worse. It's just a question of having one mind about what you want to do, and the analytical ability to put that design into a plan, and the willpower to follow through and make it happen, as well as the resources to make that vision a reality. Interestingly enough, this corresponds to the four elements, and their respective areas of influence- first is thought- air, the intellect. The next is emotional commitment, the desire to 'make this happen', to win and succeed- water. Next is the drive and passion, the energy and stick-to-it-iveness- fire. Finally, the material concerns, perhaps even the body that acts in the material world to make things happen- earth. I could belabor the point that this is reflected in the Tarot, but that's pretty much been done to death at this point- nothing you don't know already, I'm going to guess. I'm beginning to see the Tarot as a means to an end, a raft, as Buddha would say. And where does this raft go? I'm hoping to a deeper understanding of the human condition. Really, if God didn't want us to travel, why did s/he leave us a map, and all these clues? Well, as always, steer clear of the Tenafly Viper, and I've got to go do laundry at Deep 13.

Friday Night at Deep 13

Seems we've managed to get ourselves more or less settled at the new apartment, christened Deep 13 for some unknowable reason. At any rate, it needs a little artwork here and there, so I'm going to try and get cracking on that. I hate blank walls, reminds me of a mental hospital.
At any rate, I'm sure my artistic abilities (limited at any rate) are a little rusty, but I'll see what I can do. Last night was the usual Friday, hanging out with not much going on, so we watched some movies- seems like it was comic-book-to-film night, as first up was Kick Ass, based on the comic book. (Sounds kind of like my life, based on the comic book). It was a little on the violent and warped side, but very good. The title character is one dorky high schooler who decides to throw on a costume and go fight crime, resulting in a couple major beatings. Evidently there's more to being a superhero than putting on a costume. He meets up with a father-daughter duo of asassins who do the same thing, only better. It was a pretty good movie, all things considered. There are, as we probably all know, a good many real-life costumed vigilantes, but nowhere near the sheer firepower of these two. At any rate, it's worth a look, as the movie doesn't sugar-coat what could happen should you choose to throw on a costume and go forth and whoop ass. Or jump off a building, but you'll have to watch the movie for that.
Next up was Jonah Hex, named after the comic series of the same name. Hex is expertly played by Josh Brolin, and having read one or two of the comics, I'd say if Hex were a real person, that's what he'd sound, act and look like. Taking place shortly after the Civil War, it tells the story of a former Confederate soldier turned bounty hunter by the name of Jonah Hex, whose scarred left cheek is a result first of a run-in with his archenemy and later an attempt to remove said archenemy's initials from his face- he was branded with them, then used another makeshift brand to remove them. The sources of Hex's 'unnatural' powers are never fully explained, though he posesses a mediumship of sorts, with the ability to bring back the dead briefly as long as he maintains physical contact with them, and uses this ability to extract information from them. Crow Indians brought Hex back from the dead, or the edge of death, and with this a knowledge of the afterlife, and a following of crows, also never abundantly explained. A kind of film-noir western, it's worth a look, full of cool gunfights, blood and gore and bizarre weaponry.
Speaking of comic books, there's a new contender in the paper and ink market, Axe Cop. It's a bizarre little number about one axe-wielding police(?)man and his fire-breathing Tyrannosaurus steed, as well as a wild and varied cast of sidekicks, villains and general oddities. The storylines for Axe Cop come from the creatively weird imagination of the artist's five-year old brother, yet oddly enough hangs together quite well! Those of us with kids will wonder, why didn't we think of that first? Axe Cop charges around with an axe, his weapon of choice, (I guess the dinosaur's machine-gun arms are considered secondary weaponry) and disposes of various and sundry monsters. You can read most of the episodes online at www.axecop.com, and read the thrilling story of how Axe Cop came to be. Not bad for a five-year old! It's actually a pretty coherent narrative, and worth a few laughs. So at any rate, enjoy the surreal life around us, as sometimes the real world is stranger than fiction.