Waiting for The Rain

I said 'hey, listen to me

Stay sane inside insanity

But he locked the door and threw away the key!'"

-Little Nell, The Rocky Horror Picture Show

I wanna bowl with

The ganstas, but oh well I'm just too white and nerdy

-Weird Al Yankovic, White and Nerdy

Today was a good day, as far as injuries were concerned. I had to check out a small track vehicle, something akin to an M113, though I'm not positive what the actual model number is. It's a small, boxy affair, with little weaponry, but a ton of armor. We call it the Batmobile, for reasons not known to me. At any rate, it's generally used as a mobile command module, which is always fun. However, it needs to be periodically inspected, and that was my job today. The thing is, it has steel plating making up its outer hull. While this is quite effective in stopping small-arms fire, it also gets very hot when sitting in the sun all day. This I found out first when I had to check the engine compartment. It has a metal panel on the front, which opens up, allowing access to the engine and fluid dipsticks. It's pretty heavy, but has a support rod- kind of like on a car, where a metal rod swings down (or up) to hold the hood open. However, on this particular one, the rod decided to display the unholy resistance of a pissed-off two year old. After spending some time trying to free it, and reflecting on the advantages of not having your skin burned to bacon, I finally got the thing in place. Again, the metal plates that make up the bulk of this thing get extremely hot. Though I had my hand on the underside of the 'hood', it was still plenty warm.
So after taking about 10 minutes to get the thing in place, then maybe one minute getting the fluids checked, I had to climb up to the top hatch and get it unlocked to get inside. Once I accomplished this, it's a question of dropping a large back panel, letting some light in, and getting down to business. Keep in mind, your average track vehicle is not exactly a double-wide inside, and so in I went. Then I had to climb back out the top hatch (to check the antifreeze- for some incredible reason the radiator is on top).
So, having had a fellow soldier secure the hatch, I climbed up. The wind, which seemed to be noticeably absent in the blast-furnace heat of the interior, now decided to whip that (2" thick steel plate) hatch right onto the side of my head. After blackening the paint with a torrent of words perhaps long lost to the sands of time, I went back up and checked the antifreeze, burning (again) my hands and arms on the surface of the vehicle. Yes, all in all, a productive and painful day. So this upcoming week when I convoy out in the thing, I'll try to resist my baser urges and not run it off the road into a ditch.

In other, unrelated news, I had time this morning for another Tarot reading. It was one I hadn't done in a while, a Horseshoe spread. It consists of seven cards, as follows-
The first card tells of the past, at the base of the horseshoe. Here was the 10 of Swords- defeat, destruction, but at the same time from the spilled blood a flower grows, (he says, hoping that doesn't sound too much like an oracle). The 10 represents a process of ending, but at the same time beginning again. This seems to fit pretty well, in light of everything that has already transpired.
In the next position, the present, is the 10 of Wands. Like the 10 of Swords, this one tells of completion, and in this case, the burden of a new undertaking. It could be the weight of a divorce, and the mixed emotions it brings with it. Unfortunate, but true.
Now in the next position, which tells of the Future, is The Devil. This tells often of negative patterns, like an addiction, or something that you have the power to release yourself from, though at the same time, this may not be entirely clear- often the Devil tells of a need for outside perspective, and in this case, I think it points to simply DFA- Don't F*ck Around- I've come pretty far already, and the past does not need to repeat itself. A lot of it does seem to be just that- that I never realized I could break the cycle whenever I wanted. But the result of this is what? That I'm in a position to either go backwards or forwards- repeat the whole thing over again, or go forwards, throw off the chains that I left there for far too long.
The next position tells of the best course of action, given the current situation. Here is the 6 of Swords, which makes a good degree of sense- the 6 tells of travel and change, of things moving forwards, and, in a word, change. This points to change for the better, I'm glad to say. Yet the impetus is there, it falls to me to put it into motion, follow through and just get on with life.
The next position tells of thoughts and feelings, and here was The Star- telling of things working out, it would seem nothing can stand in the way of sheer determination and will. Well, that's all well and good, but there's a more subtle message I see here- I don't get carte blanche on this one- the universe has a purpose, and I'm beginning to believe I've just recently begun to grasp it. So thusly, there are two options- continue along, fighting the good fight, or go off on your own. A small boat survives the rapids not by fighting, but rather by being borne along on the currents. Not that it's really going to be that hard, a part of this card tells of signs and direction- it's a simple matter to figure out where you're supposed to be going, or where you're being prompted.
The next position tells of hidden influences- things that may not be apparent, but affect you nonetheless. Here was the 8 of Swords, which I found interesting, and also cutting. (pun not intended). For a long time I was afraid to make a move- I admit it, I thought better the Devil (again, no pun intended) that I know than the one I don't know. Well, there's one aspect I overlooked- sure, I may get a little scraped up here and there, but ultimately it's better to fight than to wait, suspended and afraid to move. Better to take it and move on- the image of this card is a blindfolded woman, bound and surrounded by swords. It looks like wherever she moves, she's going to have a nasty sharp surprise waiting. However, this woman is bound by her own hands, not by the swords around her. Sooner or later she'll grow tired, and have to make a move. The fact that she knows it's coming somehow makes it worse- the actual event is rarely as terrible as we imagine it to be. So at any rate, the message here is take a deep breath, go for it, and accept the consequences. This too makes sense, and in some ways has already begun- in some ways my hand was forced, but nonetheless, it's definitely proving to be for the best. Painful, but for the best.
The last position tells of the Outcome- here was the 5 of Wands. It represents conflict, and disharmony- often compared to arguing with yourself, the card tells of uncertainty and doubt, and with this, the fear of making the wrong decision. Nonetheless, looking back at the 8 of Swords, it seems the best course of action is to plow through, marshall resources as best I can, and move on with life. No one ever said it would be easy, but I know it's worth it in the long run.