Monjoie

I was reading through some of the old letters I wrote to Tabatha back in the day, actually before I left for basic training. A few were of old dreams that still stick in my head, although none of them make any sense, then or now. And it got me thinking how far I've come, how it seems like many years since I wrote those words, and how much things have changed. All the reasons I joined the Army, all the things I've seen and done- have they all been worth it? And is this life I've built worth fighting for? For a long time I was hard put to answer these questions. Now, however, I realize- yes, it's worth it. It was then, and it is now. That doesn't change. But I'll admit, there are times when the battle wears on you- sometimes it seems like a constant uphill struggle, and no end in sight, and I'd give anything just to have it come to some end, any end. But then in the long run, what did I really expect? And besides, if it's worth fighting for, you fight for it. And you never quit, regardless of what the odds are against you or for you.
But although this leaves a lot of questions unanswered, I think it resolves it in my own mind- I don't know how to quit, and maybe that's not a bad thing.